In girum imus nocte et consumimur igni

"We go round in the dark, consumed by fire". There is little around us to show us what love really is, how it is to be practiced, and what to do in specific situations. The fire of passion consumes us, and we mistake it for the light of drivenness.

Passion, may it be anger, or... what we call love. But it isn't love. It's sexual attraction. It's idealized fantasms. It's emotional dependence. It's whatever you want, but in most cases, it isn't love. No wonder it hurts.

Have a purpose. Be driven. In everything. But don't think that love is going to be served to you on a silver plate. Love is something you search for, something you choose, something you discern, something you work on, something you keep up.

Love is hard work

The thing about love, it's that it's like life. It's hard work. Most people just let it come and let it work on its own, they submit to whatever and however it makes them feel. Life is good, I'm happy, life is bad, I'm sad. Love makes me feel butterflies, I'm happy, love breaks my heart, I'm sad. It's just not me, it's love, it's life, I'm the victim.

Well, maybe you should stop whining about how things make you feel and start controling yourself a little bit. When you get happy, or angry... well it's you. You, your body, your feelings. And you can control it. You put up everyday with lots of things, so you can do that too.

The problem, then, comes with how you put up with things. Pushing them under the rag is not a good idea. Stop dealing with the consequences of the problem, go for its source. It's in you. Refuse to get angry or sad for things that are not worth it. It's okay to express your feelings, better than stuffing them in, but work on your reaction to things that usually make you feel bad. Because, in the end, there will always be bad things. And if you don't work to refuse the effect they have on you, you're enslaving yourself to those things.

You have control. You just choose to surrender it to those things. Take it back.